Every time I hear that Jann Arden song, I cringe in shame.

It was going to be a really sweet, poignant part of my presentation, playing in the background while participants crafted their key messages. It would exemplify:
a calm body (feet on ground),
a clear message (heart in hand, facing forward)
and
authentic communicating (be yourself).
Instead, it was a stressful addition to the presentation, with the IT helpers confounded by my ancient laptop, a clumsy cuing to start it, and in the end, I entirely forgot to mention why I played it.
It is for sure the worst presentation I’ve ever delivered.
I got so many things wrong.
😅 I didn’t know the venue:
I didn’t ask enough questions about the space: I thought it was going to be in a small room, to about 30 people. Instead, it was the big conference room, with about 200 people.
🫣 I tried to do too much:
In just a half an hour, I planned to cover diaphragmatic breathing (bad idea—never easy to teach to a big audience), identifying key messages (seems so simple, but it’s SO hard), and doing an interactive activity (which I had to abandon, being impossible to adapt from 30 people to 200).
😬I didn’t know my audience:
They were young. Young. I was by far the oldest person in that room, and nobody I mean nobody would know Jann Arden.
I get a feeling of shame and embarrassment about that presentation every time I hear that song. That sweet, beautiful song makes me cringe for just a moment.
But you know what? Over time, that moment gets shorter and shorter.
I have learned not to dwell.
I hear the song, the feeling comes up, I say ‘Oh hi, Shame and Embarrassment, there you are again. I expected you’,
and I quickly follow with ‘Off you go. No need for you today.’
I can’t stop the memory from popping into my head, but I can decide how long it gets to hang out there.
These days, it just gets about three seconds before self-compassion washes over me, and I can laugh at myself.
We make the mistakes.
We learn the lessons.
But we
do
not
dwell.
That’s what my own good mother taught me.
Thanks, Mom.
Thanks, Jann.
Thanks, Jann’s mom.